Crazy Status Short Quotes 2016


  1. I'm not lazy, I'm on energy saving mode.
  2. =====================================
  3. I love my job only when I'm on vacation.....
  4. =====================================
  5. Never make eye contact while eating a banana.
  6. =====================================
  7. Life is Short - Chat Fast!
  8. =====================================
  9. If life gives you lemons, just add vodka.
  10. =====================================
  11. How can i miss something i never had?
  12. =====================================
  13. Hey there whatsapp is using me.
  14. =====================================
  15. Girls use photoshop to look beautiful.. Boys use photoshop to show their creativity.
  16. =====================================
  17. Fact: Phone on silent mode- 10 Missed call... Turns volume to loud- Nobody calls all day!!
  18. =====================================
  19. Girls, if he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs. send him to KFC.
  20. =====================================
  21. You can never buy Love....But still you have to pay for it ..
  22. =====================================
  23. If you are going to speak bad things about me on my back, come to me. I'll tell you more.
  24. =====================================
  25. Did anyone else notice the sound if you click the like button on my status?
  26. =====================================
  27. I live in a world of fantasy, so keep your reality away from me!
  28. =====================================
  29. A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it.
  30. =====================================
  31. My biggest concern in life is actually how my online friends can be informed of my death..!!
  32. =====================================
  33. When I'm a Pedestrian I Hate cars.. When I'm Driving I Hate Pedestrians...
  34. =====================================
  35. Whoever says "Good Morning" on Monday's deserves to get slapped :)
  36. =====================================
  37. Mosquitos are like family. Annoying but they carry your blood.
  38. =====================================
  39. Funny Status for Whatsapp 
  40. =====================================
  41. Who needs television when there is so much drama on Facebook.
  42. =====================================
  43. Everything funnier when your supposed to be quiet..
  44. =====================================
  45. I want someone to look at me the way I look at cupcakes!!
  46. =====================================
  47. Save water drink beer.
  48. =====================================
  49. Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software...it's called #Monday, please fix it
  50. =====================================
  51. Always wear cute pajamas to bed you'll never know who you will meet in your dreams.
  52. =====================================
  53. God is really creative , i mean ..just look at me :P
  54. =====================================
  55. Decided to burn lots of calories today so I set a fat kid on fire.
  56. =====================================
  57. When I'm on my death bed, I want my final words to be "I left one million dollars in the...
  58. =====================================
  59. I wake up when I cant hold my pee in any longer.
  60. =====================================
  61. My father always told me, 'Find a job you love and you'll never have to work a day in your life.
  62. =====================================
  63. Life is too short smile while you still have teeth...
  64. =====================================
  65. My study period = 15 minutes. My break time = 3 hours.
  66. =====================================
  67. If College has taught us anything, it's texting without looking :)
  68. =====================================
  69. I'm Jealous Of My Parents... I'll Never Have A Kid As Cool As Theirs!
  70. =====================================
  71. Here my dad comes on whatsapp... From now on my status would be '***no status***' or just a smiley...
  72. =====================================

  73. Don't kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not.
  74. =====================================
  75. I Like to study.. Arithmetic - NO ... world history - NO .... chemistry - NO .... GIRLS - YES!!!
  76. =====================================
  77. Friends are forever, until they get in a relationship
  78. =====================================
  79. People call me mike .. You can call me tonight.. :p
  80. =====================================
  81. In Modern Politics, Even The Leader Of The Free World Needs Help From The Sultan Of Facebookistan!!!
  82. =====================================
  83. C.L.A.S.S- come late and start sleeping :)
  84. =====================================
  85. Faces YOU Make ON The Toilet lol 
  86. =====================================
  87. Everything is 10x funnier when you are not supposed to laugh.
  88. =====================================
  89. People who exercise live longer, but what's the point when those extra years are spent at gym.
  90. =====================================
  91. Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi connection.
  92. =====================================
  93. It may look like I'm deep in thought, but 99% of the time I'm just thinking about what food to eat later.
  94. =====================================
  95. Checking your symptoms on Google and accepting that fact that you're going to die.
  96. =====================================
  97. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why.
  98. =====================================
  99. Wrestling is obviously fake. Why would two people fight over a belt when neither of them are wearing pants?
  100. =====================================
  101. Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk.
  102. =====================================
  103. We are WTF generation .... WhatsApp, Twitter and Facebook
  104. =====================================
  105. Having a best friend with the same mental disorder is a blessing.
  106. =====================================
  107. It's been 70+ years, Tom. You're never going to eat Jerry
  108. =====================================
  109. I want some one to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone. 
  110. =====================================
  111. There's like 7 billion people in this world and no one wants to date me. I hate this world ... huh
  112. =====================================
  113. Dear Lord, all I ask for a chance to prove that winning the lottery won't make a bad person.
  114. =====================================
  115. I don't usually sleep enough, but when I do, it's still not enough
  116. =====================================
  117. My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. lolz
  118. =====================================
  119. The only thing I gained so far in THIS YEAR is weight :)
  120. =====================================
  121. I am not addicted to WHATS APP. I only use it when I have time ....... lunch time, break time, bed time, this time, that time, any time, all the time. :)
  122. =====================================
  123. Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown male child who can not be handled by his parents anymore.
  124. =====================================
  125. The most powerful words other than I LOVE YOU is "Salary is Credited"..
  126. =====================================
  127. Is there anything more awkward than when you are singing along to a song on youtube and the music stops loading.
  128. =====================================
  129. Years of education, solving tough problems, handling complex issues, yet we take a while standing before glass doors thinking whether to Push or Pull.
  130. =====================================
  131. Flirtationship: More than a friendship and less than a relationship.
  132. =====================================
  133. Running away does not help you with your problems, unless you are fat.
  134. =====================================
  135. In bed, it's 6AM you close your eyes for 5 minutes, it's 7:45. At school it's 1:30, close your eyes for 5 minutes, it's 1:31
  136. =====================================
  137. I wonder what happens when doctor's wife eats an apple a day. :)
  138. =====================================
  139. GOOGLE must be a woman because it knows everything.
  140. =====================================
  141. I only need 3 things in life: Food, Wifi, Sleep :)
  142. =====================================
  143. Boys, if you don't look like calvin klein models, don't expect us to look like victoria secrets angels.From All Bachelor Girls Association
  144. =====================================
  145. I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.
  146. =====================================
  147. TODAY has been cencelled. Go back to BED :)
  148. =====================================
  149. I've had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. :)
  150. =====================================
  151. Some people should have multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.
  152. =====================================
  153. At least mosquito's are attracted to me.
  154. =====================================
  155. Funny Status Quotes for Whatsapp
  156. =====================================

  157. Laughing at your own texts before you send them because you are so damn funny.
  158. =====================================
  159. I really need 5 hours of Facebook to balance out my 5 minutes of studying.
  160. =====================================
  161. When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you?
  162. =====================================
  163. Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up. :D
  164. =====================================
  165. Restaurant Advertisement: We serve food as HOT as your neighbour's wife; And beer as COLD as your own. :)
  166. =====================================
  167. My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. lol
  168. =====================================
  169. If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, nobody else wanted them either :)
  170. =====================================
  171. Today's Relationships: You can touch each other but not each others phones.
  172. =====================================
  173. I am sure I have a defective iPhone, I keep pressing the home button and I'm still at work.
  174. =====================================
  175. A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house.
  176. =====================================
  177. When a woman says WHAT? Its not because she didn't hear you. She's giving you a chance to change what you said.
  178. =====================================
  179. My bed is always extra comfortable when I need to get out of it in the morning.
  180. =====================================
  181. One day your prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and is too stubborn to ask for directions :)
  182. =====================================
  183. I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice
  184. =====================================
  185. If time does not wait for you, don't worry. Just remove the battery from the clock and enjoy life.
  186. =====================================
  187. If school has taught us anything, it's texting without looking
  188. =====================================
  189. I hate people who steal my ideas, before I think of them
  190. =====================================
  191. All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips.
  192. =====================================
  193. Try to say the letter M without your lips touching.
  194. =====================================
  195. Excuse me .... Plesae empty your pockets .... I think you stole my heart.

No comments :

Post a Comment